Compensation for the Sacrifices We Make

At one of our FRG steering meetings, another FRG leader expressed frustration with a wife who was insisting that someone come mow her lawn.

“If her husband were here, he’d do it,” the wife argued.

Since he was not here because he was defending the country, the government should do it (or pay for it).

A bit nutty–but I can empathize. Being pregnant, I should probably not mow the lawn, either, and I just found out that the lawn care service we use raised their prices by over 30% this year.

When a member of the household is not available, all sorts of time, energy, and money must be spent to make up for the chores they normally complete.

However, the military does actually pay for these sorts of things, after a fashion. It is called Family Separation Allowance.

Not to mention the Per Diem that recognizes the additional costs the soldier pays being away from home, the Hardship Pay acknowledges that some assignments are particularly undesireable, and the Hostile Fire Pay gives a bit more for zones where troops face fire.

Of course, some of these could be a bit higher to reflect the reality of the financial costs and emotional burdens and no amount of money makes up for not having your loved one around.

However, The decision to join the military was one my husband (and hers, and all the other men in the Battalion) made freely…knowing full well that deployment was likely.

Ultimately, enlistment is a free choice and the government does recognize the burden deployment places on the families. The system is not perfect, but I would say it is fair.

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20 comments

  1. kbug says:

    I think the military does the best they can most of the time with the resources they are given. However, the FRG is probably more important than all the special money allowances offered, and I’m not sure you guys are ever compensated for any of the work you do to make things easier for families when soldiers deploy. You work hard, and after reading your post, I realize that you put up with quite a bit of nonsense, too. God bless all of you for what you do!!!

  2. kbug says:

    I think the military does the best they can most of the time with the resources they are given. However, the FRG is probably more important than all the special money allowances offered, and I’m not sure you guys are ever compensated for any of the work you do to make things easier for families when soldiers deploy. You work hard, and after reading your post, I realize that you put up with quite a bit of nonsense, too. God bless all of you for what you do!!!

  3. kbug says:

    I think the military does the best they can most of the time with the resources they are given. However, the FRG is probably more important than all the special money allowances offered, and I’m not sure you guys are ever compensated for any of the work you do to make things easier for families when soldiers deploy. You work hard, and after reading your post, I realize that you put up with quite a bit of nonsense, too. God bless all of you for what you do!!!

  4. kbug says:

    I think the military does the best they can most of the time with the resources they are given. However, the FRG is probably more important than all the special money allowances offered, and I’m not sure you guys are ever compensated for any of the work you do to make things easier for families when soldiers deploy. You work hard, and after reading your post, I realize that you put up with quite a bit of nonsense, too. God bless all of you for what you do!!!

  5. kbug says:

    I think the military does the best they can most of the time with the resources they are given. However, the FRG is probably more important than all the special money allowances offered, and I’m not sure you guys are ever compensated for any of the work you do to make things easier for families when soldiers deploy. You work hard, and after reading your post, I realize that you put up with quite a bit of nonsense, too. God bless all of you for what you do!!!

  6. Personally, I’d rather have the money than a good FRG (ha, ha)…but I think that for some people, they would never know about the money or the programs without the FRG.

    I can tell you FRG volunteers are never compensated (externally) other than the occasional framed certificate and the even rarer thank you from someone we’ve helped…but of course, that’s not why we do it!

    I’m going to post at some point though about how I think the military needs to reexamine their reliance on unit volunteers.

    There are some professional-quality volunteers on every post, but it is asking for a bit much to expect that every unit will just by coincidence have someone ready, willing, and able to run the FRG, not to mention others to help her out!

    More on that another time.

  7. Personally, I’d rather have the money than a good FRG (ha, ha)…but I think that for some people, they would never know about the money or the programs without the FRG.

    I can tell you FRG volunteers are never compensated (externally) other than the occasional framed certificate and the even rarer thank you from someone we’ve helped…but of course, that’s not why we do it!

    I’m going to post at some point though about how I think the military needs to reexamine their reliance on unit volunteers.

    There are some professional-quality volunteers on every post, but it is asking for a bit much to expect that every unit will just by coincidence have someone ready, willing, and able to run the FRG, not to mention others to help her out!

    More on that another time.

  8. Personally, I’d rather have the money than a good FRG (ha, ha)…but I think that for some people, they would never know about the money or the programs without the FRG.

    I can tell you FRG volunteers are never compensated (externally) other than the occasional framed certificate and the even rarer thank you from someone we’ve helped…but of course, that’s not why we do it!

    I’m going to post at some point though about how I think the military needs to reexamine their reliance on unit volunteers.

    There are some professional-quality volunteers on every post, but it is asking for a bit much to expect that every unit will just by coincidence have someone ready, willing, and able to run the FRG, not to mention others to help her out!

    More on that another time.

  9. Personally, I’d rather have the money than a good FRG (ha, ha)…but I think that for some people, they would never know about the money or the programs without the FRG.

    I can tell you FRG volunteers are never compensated (externally) other than the occasional framed certificate and the even rarer thank you from someone we’ve helped…but of course, that’s not why we do it!

    I’m going to post at some point though about how I think the military needs to reexamine their reliance on unit volunteers.

    There are some professional-quality volunteers on every post, but it is asking for a bit much to expect that every unit will just by coincidence have someone ready, willing, and able to run the FRG, not to mention others to help her out!

    More on that another time.

  10. Personally, I’d rather have the money than a good FRG (ha, ha)…but I think that for some people, they would never know about the money or the programs without the FRG.

    I can tell you FRG volunteers are never compensated (externally) other than the occasional framed certificate and the even rarer thank you from someone we’ve helped…but of course, that’s not why we do it!

    I’m going to post at some point though about how I think the military needs to reexamine their reliance on unit volunteers.

    There are some professional-quality volunteers on every post, but it is asking for a bit much to expect that every unit will just by coincidence have someone ready, willing, and able to run the FRG, not to mention others to help her out!

    More on that another time.

  11. I feel for you with this one. Hang in there girl!

  12. I feel for you with this one. Hang in there girl!

  13. I feel for you with this one. Hang in there girl!

  14. I feel for you with this one. Hang in there girl!

  15. I feel for you with this one. Hang in there girl!

  16. sylvia says:

    I just wanted to commend you on your awesome attitude. I too am an army wife and right now we are stationed overseas. It seems everywhere I turn on our current post…there is so much negativity. soldiers and spouses complaining about anything and everything!!!! I just want to shake them and ask them “why did you enlist?” or “why did you marry a solder?” I was looking for FRG info tonight online (I am a leader) and came across your blog and it was just what I needed!!! Thanks for the boost!!!

  17. sylvia says:

    I just wanted to commend you on your awesome attitude. I too am an army wife and right now we are stationed overseas. It seems everywhere I turn on our current post…there is so much negativity. soldiers and spouses complaining about anything and everything!!!! I just want to shake them and ask them “why did you enlist?” or “why did you marry a solder?” I was looking for FRG info tonight online (I am a leader) and came across your blog and it was just what I needed!!! Thanks for the boost!!!

  18. sylvia says:

    I just wanted to commend you on your awesome attitude. I too am an army wife and right now we are stationed overseas. It seems everywhere I turn on our current post…there is so much negativity. soldiers and spouses complaining about anything and everything!!!! I just want to shake them and ask them “why did you enlist?” or “why did you marry a solder?” I was looking for FRG info tonight online (I am a leader) and came across your blog and it was just what I needed!!! Thanks for the boost!!!

  19. sylvia says:

    I just wanted to commend you on your awesome attitude. I too am an army wife and right now we are stationed overseas. It seems everywhere I turn on our current post…there is so much negativity. soldiers and spouses complaining about anything and everything!!!! I just want to shake them and ask them “why did you enlist?” or “why did you marry a solder?” I was looking for FRG info tonight online (I am a leader) and came across your blog and it was just what I needed!!! Thanks for the boost!!!

  20. sylvia says:

    I just wanted to commend you on your awesome attitude. I too am an army wife and right now we are stationed overseas. It seems everywhere I turn on our current post…there is so much negativity. soldiers and spouses complaining about anything and everything!!!! I just want to shake them and ask them “why did you enlist?” or “why did you marry a solder?” I was looking for FRG info tonight online (I am a leader) and came across your blog and it was just what I needed!!! Thanks for the boost!!!