Choices

Fallon Wharton is a proud Army Wife who holds a degree in Mass Communications / Journalism and has her own career aspirations.  She enjoys writing poetry and short stories that draw upon her experiences and she has launched her own blog. She shared this post with us.

Sometimes life is about knowing… I don’t think all decisions are meant to be permanent, though they so often feel that way. Just the mere fact of choosing something in order to know what it will bring you. Though I use the term ‘mere’ lightly, because it’s never just a mere choice is it? It’s a definite proverbial fork in the road with its glaring signs “this way to…” “Or that way to…” and if you’re lucky, as I have been, neither choice is bad, but the choices are so different that it’s evident each one will bring you completely different results. One result might leave you looking back on your life thinking.. “damn, what would have happened if I would have went that-a-way??” So, I tend to choose the one that I feel won’t derive the ‘what if’ of life, though that’s never really guaranteed.

So often, we make a choice that we know is important to better ourselves for now and the future, and because we don’t want to live with the ‘what if’ thought. “What if I wouldn’t have or would have done that?” We make a choice, we learn, we see after so long where that choice is taking us. We’re then presented with another choice, another, and another. I guess that is the beauty to life. The freedom to choose. I guess that is an adversity to life. The freedom to choose. Through all of these choices some are obviously easier, while others feel, and often are, insurmountably more difficult.

I recently had to talk to my boss about my job, potentially leaving to be with my husband, or stay with the company but working remotely so I can live with my military husband. (I know, odd right, the thought of actually living with your husband?!? Ok, bad joke. ) Mind you, this job is one I love, with a company I can go very far in, not to mention learn a lot. It’s mirroring back to me the potential dream career I thought never was. So, though confronting your boss in this manner may not sound like much, it was by far one of the hardest things I’ve had to face, and a nerve-wracking experience at that. I’ve only been with this company for 9 months, all the while planning on staying here until my better half was done with training in another 8 months. Then we would find out where we’d be stationed, and only then would I potentially leave the office here in Virginia to work from home, transfer offices, or totally walk away depending on what the military decided for our lives. Ah it felt as if we had planned the perfect yellow brick road.. but instead a change of path lie ahead, ie, another major life choice.

Choice decided to have other plans for my husband and I. What’s funny about choice is I wouldn’t even be faced with these choices if we weren’t a part of the Military, which seems very choice unfriendly, or choice-less (if you will) well – to a spouse anyway. You’re at their mercy 100% and if you have any hopes of keeping your family together and pursuing your own career, if you’re career minded the way I am, you have to keep those hopes in order and you better have a strong marriage, oh and eternal optimism doesn’t hurt. Two parties pursuing their career is a great thing… unless one of those parties is in the ever-changing-no choice making-but love my country Military. You can count on being apart a lot of the time even if you do follow your husband post to post (hooah!), and you can definitely count on being apart all of the time if you too decide you want stability enough to allow your own career and life to flourish. (mild applause) We’re faced with these choices… knowing we’re not the first, but sure feeling like we are.

Choice is made and I am moving forward with hope and a realization I can manifest and create what I want, though it often feels easier said than done. I know what I’m worth and as my mom once said, “She’ll grow wherever she is planted,” I have recently learned upon observation that I’ve proved that statement to myself time and time again, and I’ll never cease to grow nor give up on my own dreams, and I’ll always make the right choice as long as I follow my ever-so-clichéd heart, wherever that may be during my husband’s career span to… YES, defend OUR freedom. J I’ll save the what if’s for the birds… and in the meantime cherish every moment I have with the one man who means the world to me, because without my big strong Army Officer… life wouldn’t be as worth living, career or not.

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2 comments

  1. Fallon says:

    you can follow me at http://www.fallonella.com and a HUGE thank you to Candace for all her help!

  2. Amazing article. Good work done ! I’ll add it to my list now. Thanks for sharing ! :-)